Now that My Birthday Month Has Passed: Ten Things I've Learned in the Past Year

 

[image is from here]

My birth month has now passed. I contemplate what I've learned this past year. Am I wiser than when 46? I've learned, or relearned a whole lot. But here's a list of ten things. They are in no particular order. 

1. Men will lie through their teeth if it suits their interests to do so. Example: John Edwards. What a lying prick he's been to his spouse, Elizabeth. But men with far less influence on society that him fuck over women and won't be honest about it.

2. Dick-whipped (pro-patriarchal/antifeminist) men don't wish to organise to stop the rape of children, most of which is committed by fathers and other males in the girls' families or lives.

3. Men are rarely honest about what we do that is abusive. We will not volunteer information if not challenged to do so, and when challenged to do so... see point 1.

4. Some white guys are nice. Like moguls skier Alexandre Bilodeau and bobsledder Steve Holcomb, from this year's Winter Olympics. Unassuming, not afraid to be outwardly caring, without egotism and arrogance. I love those qualities in white men.

5. Liberalism and libertarianism, along with sociobiology, evolutionary psychology, and beliefs that "male" hormones and genitals control one's capacity to behave ethically, are stubbornly in place, preventing men from grasping the simplest things about why we abuse others. Things like "we can", "we want to", and nothing terrible will happen to us if we do.

6. Rapists don't think they are rapists, and procurers of women in prostitution can believe prostitution is harmless.

7. White folks won't own or understand white privileges and entitlements. And we won't, collectively, be responsible about ending genocide.

8. Targeting a single oppressed person as being a danger to society is fucked up unless they are a mass murderer, serial rapist, batterer, child molester, or incest perpetrator. If the person is a woman, the campaigns to go after her and "prove" she's a danger are misogynistic. If the person is of color, the campaigns are racist. If the person is a woman of color, the campaigns are both.

9. Don't believe any white person who says I'm not racist. Don't believe any man who says I'm not sexist. Don't believe white guys who say "I'm not sexist/racist". Ever. If we say it, that's proof enough that we don't understand how white and male privileges, entitlements, status, and power operate structurally and interpersonally.

10. Men don't want to understand radical feminist and womanist writings because men don't want to know what we do and why we do it. We'd rather be ignorant and arrogant. We'd rather think we know more than women do about everything, including feminism.