tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6744114065733119575.post7469293079580939028..comments2024-03-13T11:14:26.768-04:00Comments on A Radical Profeminist: Rape & Sexual Abuse Stats: WAY TOO LOW, and here's a couple of reasons whyUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6744114065733119575.post-44969972939960853962010-01-27T13:31:38.007-05:002010-01-27T13:31:38.007-05:00Hi toysoldier,
Most likely because the vast major...Hi toysoldier,<br /><br /><i>Most likely because the vast majority of men are not violent and so they do not feel a need to make preventing someone else's behavior a priority, perhaps in the same way that you may not regard yourself as a child rapist and therefore do not make preventing sexual violence against boys a priority.</i><br /><br />The vast majority of men are not abused factory farmed chickens and cows, but many men manage to figure out what is inhumane and what isn't and become activists to fight gross exploitation and violence, including about people and situations they don't experience directly. <br /><br /><i>[...]you can never really know whether a person has or has not committed a particular act. It would boil down to whether you personally [...]</i><br /><br />Please reread the post with your heart, not your head. You're over-thinking this one. Really.Julian Realhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02933612851144914687noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6744114065733119575.post-90936145794844169972010-01-27T12:32:32.953-05:002010-01-27T12:32:32.953-05:00If men stopped men from behaving in misogynistic a...<em>If men stopped men from behaving in misogynistic and sexist and racist ways, rape and other sexist and racist violence against women would end. Why don't men do this? Why is this not a priority?</em><br /><br />Most likely because the vast majority of men are not violent and so they do not feel a need to make preventing someone else's behavior a priority, perhaps in the same way that you may not regard yourself as a child rapist and therefore do not make preventing sexual violence against boys a priority. <br /><br /><em>So, to anyone who wants to make the case to me that "not all men are sexually abusive", you'd have to prove to me first that you are among the population of men who has never sexually violated and/or been oppressively physically aggressive against a female person.</em><br /><br />That is an impossible standard because you can never really know whether a person has or has not committed a particular act. It would boil down to whether you personally decided to take a man at his word. The problem with taking that kind of stance is that one always finds a way to confirm what one already believes. For example, the majority of the women I have encountered in person who either committed such acts or take no issue with them, especially if it is done to a boy, are feminists, so the list of feminists I personally know who have not physically or sexually abused a child is very small. I could just as easily demand that feminists prove they are among the population of women who have never sexually or physically violated any boy or man. However, it would not prove anything if I already assume they have nor would it help if I already posit that I will not take them at their word or if I claim that feminist ideology creates a framework that permits, excuses and in some instances supports sexual and physical violence against boys.<br /><br />There would literally be no way for you or any feminist to prove me wrong.Toysoldierhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18227864773686045455noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6744114065733119575.post-85833356150470544502010-01-26T15:55:54.998-05:002010-01-26T15:55:54.998-05:00For me to consider this woman's husband a rapi...For me to consider this woman's husband a rapist... For me to do that means I have to hold him accountable to ways of being he accepts as normal and natural. The problem, here, is that me holding him fully accountable could be disempowering to her. She gets to determine how this unfolds. I don't.<br /><br />She gets to decide how and in what ways he is held to account. I don't. But I can ask her "Do you mind if I talk to him about his abuse of you?" I can do that. And she knows me well enough to know that if she says "Yes, please do!" I will do so unrelentingly, until I get a strong sense that he "gets it" about him BEING A RAPIST.Julian Realhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02933612851144914687noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6744114065733119575.post-13781949817435407042010-01-26T14:57:32.406-05:002010-01-26T14:57:32.406-05:00A common excuse male rapists make is 'alcohol ...A common excuse male rapists make is 'alcohol made me commit sexual violence.' Only such men do not say 'sexual violence' what they say is 'I consumed alcohol and this is why I didn't know what I was doing to my wife/female partner/female work colleague etc.' Ahh that explains it then - alcohol is the rapist not the man. <br /><br />Julian, I've lost count of the times I've stated not all men who consume alcohol engage in sexual or physical violence against women. Nor do all men who consume alcohol become violent towards other men. I wonder why? But then not all men who commit sexual violence against women consume alcohol prior to such violence.<br /><br />True it is very, very difficult fo women to even admit to themselves the man they live with; the man who is their father, brother, work colleague, neighbour, relative did in fact commit sexual violence against them. Acknowledging that even to oneself means admitting the world is indeed not a safe place for any woman and there is nothing a woman can do to safeguard herself from sexually predatory males. <br /><br />Women know and we need not look too far to see, how white supremacist society condones and promotes our rape culture. Innumerable excuses and justifications are made for men's sexual violence against known women. <br /><br />Too few men accept and respect women's and girls' right of sexual and bodily autonomy. Ignoring a woman's sexual autonomy makes it so much easier for men to choose to ignore the woman's refusal and instead persuade themselves they know better than the woman what she wants. Always, but always it is precisely what the man wants - sexual contact as and when he demands/expects. <br /><br />Such men are indeed rapists and just because they do not use violence or physical force does not mean they are not rapists. Men do not need to use violence because too many know that constant pressure and a refusal to accept that word 'no' ensures the woman will eventually submit. I say submit not 'consent' because there is no consent when one individual - overwhelmingly male, refuses to respect or even acknowlege a woman's right of sexual and bodily autonomy. Men did not suddenly decide one day 'I'm going to rape my female parner/wife/girlfriend.' But men certainly learn as boys it is their pseudo male sex right of unlimited sexual access to any woman or girl as and when they wish. Women and girls do not have the right of saying 'no' instead they individually have to trust and hope the man they think is 'trustworthy and respects their bodily autonomy' will not one day demand his white male pseudo sexual rights.JENNIFER DREWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02112807166372869685noreply@blogger.com